Fermentation In The Extreme

I have Writers' Block(TM). I got it for Christmas, in a tiny red box, with a shiny green ribbon adorning it. It is very small, so small in fact, that you do not know that you are opening it. It creeps out of its box, up your arm, and wriggles into the depths of your ear. It climbs into the inside of your cranium, crawls to the correct side, and with its sucker-pads, fixates itself on to the part of your brain called the 'Imagination'. It then exerts a miniscule amount of pressure on to this division of the brain. Although not much pressure is being used, there is enough to prevent the usually fast flow of imaginings to the 'Mind's Eye'. The 'Imagination' is henceforth compressed.

This instigates the slow obstruction of the tiny vessel leading from the 'Imagination' to the 'Mind's Eye' by the sluggish congealing of the imaginings. Once the tube is entirely blocked, the 'Imagination' will become dormant. This condition is formally known as 'Dormancy of the Imagination', or occasionally, 'Stupidity'. 'Dormancy of the Imagination' can last from two days, to twenty years, depending entirely on the victim's dislodging ability (very important) and how severely the Writer's Block(TM) has its pad suckered to the brain. Writer's Block(TM) is not picky about its victims.

Dislodging Writer's Block(TM): This is a very tricky process, and requires a lot of skill, and lot more luck. There is only one way to dislodge Writer's Block(TM), and this involves pounding your head against a brick wall. This may not sound a skilled task, but it comprises of knowing exactly where to bang your head, and the force with which to exert. This necessitates great dexterity, and if you do not believe yourself to be quite skilled enough, leave the Writer's Block(TM) well alone, and hope that it falls off in due course. If this doesn't work, basically, you are fucked.