He Was In The Habit Of Takin' Things For Granted

I have scientific evidence that my mother is a loon, a mad woman, a head case, and also a complete and utter nutter.

As a gift for good luck, she bought me some earrings with frogs on. That's right. Frogs. Why frogs? I hear you wail. Well, her reason for frogs was this:

Frogs bring out creativity.

Right.

So let me get this straight, oh mother so wise and wonderful. You bought me earrings with frogs on them because they enhance my levels of creativity. Now, to me, this poses a couple questions.

i) In what way do frogs bring out creativity? How does a small amphibian bring out any kind of creative energy? It's a FROG. Do you see any famous frog artists? Do you see any best selling books written by A.M. Phibian? No, I don't think so. I don't see the lining in our pond decorated by a froggy mural of some kind. No, mother. Frogs do not instantly bring "creativity" to mind. Sorry.

ii) It's a French oral. Why would I need to be creative? Although, I am seeing a link between the frogs and the French bit. Perhaps mother dearest picked out these frogs, thinking about Frenchness on some crazy subconcious level. Though, I think it would have been more amusing for her to have bought me earrings with baguettes on them. Or onions. Yeh man.

Of course, it could just be that my mother has an exceptionally odd sense of humour, and she found it funny to give me frogs to put in my ears. But no. Unfortunately not. She is more serious than Tom Scott when someone puts his shoes on the shed *coughs*. She actually believes that I am more likely to pass if I have a few of bits of pond life inserted into my ears. And you wonder why I'm slightly unhinged?

So, it would seem that I am set for my French oral. No, I haven't done any revision, but that's ok, because I'm all kitted out with my lovely new frogs.