I Am So Cool.

Today has been one of the best days of my life. I have had so much fun, and I never ever want this day to end, because the funny Kris has returned. She is very, very, very funny, and all non-depressed. I thangue, Josie ( that's you, Joe, incase you hadn't guessed).

Well, tonight's guests on this edition of 'Cassie's Capers' are: Kristobel Tararara, Steven Leicester Bobbins, Daniel Oliver Gale Grant, Tissue Paper, Rozza Monkey, Abigiles Bitchy and me, you're host, Cassandra Du Fittie. I can't be bothered to carry on in this vein, so I shall tell you why I like my friends.

Krisman: She is a FUNNY MAN. I have not laughed so much in a long time. She may be silly, and invest in weird necklaces when she is bored (ie. hicky), but she has provided something to laugh at as we wile away the hours in prison. I mean school.

Stevenage: I like her because she is fatter than me. It's nice to have someone to diss. Also, occasionally (but not often), she can be a little funny. Even if she lies. I'm lying now. She's always funny. FuNnY. Like peculiar. And she laughs at my jokes, even when they are not funny.

Oli Grale Grandma: He hugs nice. And gives me his Latino. What more could I ask for? Lovely man, there. Plus he wants to wear my skirts. Cool or what?

Tom Phipples (rhymes with nipples): Hahahahaha, oh Thomas. Why are you you? You are beyond amusing. Sometimes. Even if you are blonde and ride a dragon. I mean boat. And I bet you wear a fleece in the bath.

Rambo Apples: DANCING. WE ROCK BEYOND ROCKAGE. Oh yes. We do, we do, we do-hoo. And Kylie Minogueguegueguegue should hire us to choreograph her dance moves. We are sexier than a house full of chips. I mean Royalists (HAHAHHHAHA.).

Scabby: The retard talkingness. WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME? YOU MAKE ME SPACK. Funny man.

These are the people who have made me laugh like a loon in hot pants today (except without hot pants, because that would be boyond obscene and into the realms of rankity). I love you all a lot. I shall marry you, give birth to your babies, and then sell them for a good price on Ebay. Love you, love you, love you, love you (yes, I mean you, Kat Ball).